Okay, so with the exceptions of the Drag Me To Hell and the upcoming District 9, it seems like all of this summer's sci-fi type entertainment have been re imaginings, remakes, sequels, interpretations of a toy based marketing opportunity, or some combination there of.
Don't get me wrong, I like some of this stuff (new Star Trek was awesome, and I'm sure the new Harry Potter is just fine), but how about a little bit of originality? Or, filming a book who's themes haven't been done to death? Let The Right One In & True Blood are great and all, but they are still vampire stories.
Of course a lot of this stuff is drek. The Transformers sequel was stunningly bad, and my expectations were pretty low. Between the racist caricatures in robot form, testicle jokes, rampant sexism, nonsensical & self contradictory metaphysical mumbo-jumbo, and the most obvious McGuffin in the history of McGuffins, I'm surprised it wasn't a George Lucas film (Okay, that's not fair, Lucas doesn't do testicle jokes). You will of course have to drag me kicking and screaming into the GI Joe movie. If I am to be forced to watch it, I must be made pliant with alcohol before, during, and after the film.
I see that Joe Haldeman's Forever War is in the planning stages with Ridley Scott attached, and that's promising. However: he has now signed to do an Alien prequel. I'll probably like it (anything is an improvement over AvP: Requiem), but it's ground that's been covered.
District 9 does look good though. It's plot sounds engaging, it has power armor/mechs, and Peter Jackson's involvement is usually a good sign. Beyond that we have 9, which could be great, or a big build up to nothing. It's premise is interesting and it's voice cast impressive, but it's produced by Tim Burton and I hope he kept his grubby little hands out of the visual design.
Showing posts with label Movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Movies. Show all posts
Monday, August 10, 2009
Friday, June 26, 2009
Do not go see Transformers
Do not watch Transformers: ROTF. It's really as loud, dumb, long and offensive as the critics say.
Instead, go see a Serenity Charity Screening. You'll feel better, really.
Instead, go see a Serenity Charity Screening. You'll feel better, really.
Saturday, September 6, 2008
A meditation on film, or, burn in hell Cameron Crowe
Let us take a moment from our stresses, and reflect upon the films of Cameron Crowe.
His films vary wildly in quality, from entertaining diversion (Fast Times at Ridgemont High), to self indulgent blow jobs (Vanilla Sky). Let us review them one by one, in order of release:
Fast Times at Ridgemont High: One of the three films on this list I would actually say is worth watching: its got it's moments, but ultimately becomes a meandering series of interwoven sketches. His career could have gone either way at this point. It is to be noted that he wrote, but did not direct this one, so it doesn't show him in the full light.
The Wild Life: The only Crowe movie I have not seen. Boasted as "from the creators of Fast Times at Ridgemont High", and has a middle of the road IMDB raiting. Take it as you will.
Say Anything...: The second worthwhile movie on the list, as long as you've just graduated from high school. It's sort of like a John Hughes movie with a male lead, and slightly more realistic characters. It has not aged well as a film, but can still be enjoyed if just for it's place in thrusting John Cusack into the lime light.
Singles: And here our true troubles begin. A framework for a grunge soundtrack with a maudlin collection of stories about people in lousy relationships. Unwatchable clap trap.
Jerry McGuire: One of the worst movies I have ever seen. Predicable, sappy vehicle for a collection of catch phrases. Add in a cute kid, Rene Zelwigger, and Cuba Gooding Jr. screaming his head off in one of the most puzzling Oscar awarded performances of the last twenty years, and you've got a simply terrible movie. It didn't help that I kept having to hear SHOW ME THE MONEY!! bellowed from my roommates, who did not agree with my assessment of the film, for several weeks following it's release.
Almost Famous: The third and final decent movie on the list. While a little sappy, it has a good heart. It's music fits the film, & the time period, though the ending seems a bit hooky. The typical Croweisms were there, but were tolerable. I started to forgive Crowe for his missteps...
Vanilla Sky: Until I saw this maudlin, nonsensical piece of shit. I refuse to dwell on it, other than to ponder this: When a perfectly good foreign film is made (The Wings of Desire), why do we, as Americans, remake them as far inferior vehicles for our lesser stars (City of Angles staring Meg Ryan)?
Elizabethtown: Say Anything... only with a dull story and twenty somethings at a funeral. Retreading your previous material does not make for a good thing Mister Crowe.
While some films suffer from it more than others, all of them feel like a series of events strung together to form a whole rather than a cohesive story. Its like watching a series of SNL skits with connectors to make them seem like an actual narrative. I'm done with him, and bored to tears with his shitty movies. I'd rather watch a Uwe Boll film. At least he knows what he is: a hack.
(Thank you Holly for giving me the nudge to get blogging again)
His films vary wildly in quality, from entertaining diversion (Fast Times at Ridgemont High), to self indulgent blow jobs (Vanilla Sky). Let us review them one by one, in order of release:
Fast Times at Ridgemont High: One of the three films on this list I would actually say is worth watching: its got it's moments, but ultimately becomes a meandering series of interwoven sketches. His career could have gone either way at this point. It is to be noted that he wrote, but did not direct this one, so it doesn't show him in the full light.
The Wild Life: The only Crowe movie I have not seen. Boasted as "from the creators of Fast Times at Ridgemont High", and has a middle of the road IMDB raiting. Take it as you will.
Say Anything...: The second worthwhile movie on the list, as long as you've just graduated from high school. It's sort of like a John Hughes movie with a male lead, and slightly more realistic characters. It has not aged well as a film, but can still be enjoyed if just for it's place in thrusting John Cusack into the lime light.
Singles: And here our true troubles begin. A framework for a grunge soundtrack with a maudlin collection of stories about people in lousy relationships. Unwatchable clap trap.
Jerry McGuire: One of the worst movies I have ever seen. Predicable, sappy vehicle for a collection of catch phrases. Add in a cute kid, Rene Zelwigger, and Cuba Gooding Jr. screaming his head off in one of the most puzzling Oscar awarded performances of the last twenty years, and you've got a simply terrible movie. It didn't help that I kept having to hear SHOW ME THE MONEY!! bellowed from my roommates, who did not agree with my assessment of the film, for several weeks following it's release.
Almost Famous: The third and final decent movie on the list. While a little sappy, it has a good heart. It's music fits the film, & the time period, though the ending seems a bit hooky. The typical Croweisms were there, but were tolerable. I started to forgive Crowe for his missteps...
Vanilla Sky: Until I saw this maudlin, nonsensical piece of shit. I refuse to dwell on it, other than to ponder this: When a perfectly good foreign film is made (The Wings of Desire), why do we, as Americans, remake them as far inferior vehicles for our lesser stars (City of Angles staring Meg Ryan)?
Elizabethtown: Say Anything... only with a dull story and twenty somethings at a funeral. Retreading your previous material does not make for a good thing Mister Crowe.
While some films suffer from it more than others, all of them feel like a series of events strung together to form a whole rather than a cohesive story. Its like watching a series of SNL skits with connectors to make them seem like an actual narrative. I'm done with him, and bored to tears with his shitty movies. I'd rather watch a Uwe Boll film. At least he knows what he is: a hack.
(Thank you Holly for giving me the nudge to get blogging again)
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
I know....
I know it's been awhile. Holidays are keeping us busy, and work's been very crazy. I'll post, and send quiche recipes as soon as I can.
Oh, and for the love of all that is holy, some one please buy me this. We can't afford it right now, and It will be hard to find later.
Oh, and for the love of all that is holy, some one please buy me this. We can't afford it right now, and It will be hard to find later.
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Transformers
(minor spoilers) So yesterday, I got to be 8 for a two and a half hours or so while watching helicopters, tanks, trucks and other such things turn into giant robots and beat the hell out of each other.
Sure it had a few Bayisms (a little to long, some pained dialog, etc), but he kept himself largely in check (Spielberg's production influence at work I suspect). The story wasn't bad, many of the actors actually acted, and then there's the giant robots.
Both Sadimac and I got a little tingly when Optimus Prime made his big entrance, and then made the big announcement of his name in that great original voice (by Peter Cullen) that resonates through my childhood memories.
It's from a kind of corny childhood cartoon, I know, but it's a voice that I associate with (an admittedly larger than life) integrity, bravery, and self-sacrifice. Only one fictional screen character since then (Maximus form Gladiator) has carried that weight for me, and I've always compared him to Prime anyhow.
The action scenes were great. Blackout's attack on a human army base, Ironhide dodging a barrage of Starscreams missles, Prime fighting Bonecrusher on a freeway, and a badly damaged Bumblebee taking on Brawl really stand out, but everything is just such a thrill your favorites will surely vary.
My last bit of praise goes to the use of strong female characters, with no weak ones to "balance it out." Maybe Bay took a cue from Joss Whedon, maybe he went out on his own, but either way it's a welcome sight that we're seeing more, but not nearly enough.
Sure it had a few Bayisms (a little to long, some pained dialog, etc), but he kept himself largely in check (Spielberg's production influence at work I suspect). The story wasn't bad, many of the actors actually acted, and then there's the giant robots.
Both Sadimac and I got a little tingly when Optimus Prime made his big entrance, and then made the big announcement of his name in that great original voice (by Peter Cullen) that resonates through my childhood memories.
It's from a kind of corny childhood cartoon, I know, but it's a voice that I associate with (an admittedly larger than life) integrity, bravery, and self-sacrifice. Only one fictional screen character since then (Maximus form Gladiator) has carried that weight for me, and I've always compared him to Prime anyhow.
The action scenes were great. Blackout's attack on a human army base, Ironhide dodging a barrage of Starscreams missles, Prime fighting Bonecrusher on a freeway, and a badly damaged Bumblebee taking on Brawl really stand out, but everything is just such a thrill your favorites will surely vary.
My last bit of praise goes to the use of strong female characters, with no weak ones to "balance it out." Maybe Bay took a cue from Joss Whedon, maybe he went out on his own, but either way it's a welcome sight that we're seeing more, but not nearly enough.
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